I see all these ads lately. Celebrities who look totally different without makeup! Well, yeah, they all do; they took off their face. You wear makeup most of your life, yeah, you're gonna look different as hell when you peel it out of all your crow's feet and wrinkles. They had that crap caked in there every day for years on end; in order to not look different you'd have to have had so many facelifts that I could do my own makeup looking into the shiny stretched skin of your cheek.
I saw this commercial for a model doing a photo shoot. She had her legs bent at the knees, and her feet weren't even under her; they were to her sides. Her hands were in her hair, her head was thrown back and her mouth was open. She looked like a mix between a stripper and a fish; and she stood there, just like that, probably swallowing back drool, for minutes as the cameraman got ready to take the picture. Her eyebrows were drawn on and she looked like she had woken up minutes before and slapped the makeup on with her feet without using a mirror. She looked absolutely insane. Beautiful, maybe, but it's ridiculous what people will do for the camera guy. And she'd have looked a lot more beautiful if she'd closed her fat lips, or at least have tilted them into a smile.
'Course, with all that makeup on, if she tried smiling her cheeks might have begun to peel.
And she really needed to put on some clothes. I don't care how thin and smooth you are; I don't want to see all that hanging out while I'm trying to eat. Nor do I want to see naked people so incredibly fat that if they started clapping, they could take flight. I might have a little pouch on me, but at least I don't weigh more than half the mass of the car. In comparison my little belly is wee. Cute, even. Their arms alone probably weigh more than I do. It really inspires me to work out, though, because I don't want to end up like that. Wearing tents for clothing. Having to wear two hospital gowns at once just to cover myself. Having one plane seat for each ass cheek. Being lifted by the construction truck because I couldn't squeeze my fat ass through the double doors. No thank you. There is a limit; and when your belly button can kiss your boobs, you've reached it!
Well, okay, that's probably enough. I probably come across as just a bitch, but I'm really just trying to improve my humor. Not that all that isn't true, but hell, I'm probably just spending too much time around my brother. The tent clothes, the hospital gown, that's all him.
And I claim the rest.
Well, anyway, on to a topic that's not so heavy. I keep bothering Mom, "Want to watch some Little House?" Not that I care for all the drama and tears and church-Bible-God-church-Bible-God stuff. I don't. But, the story lines are generally good. I like the characters. Mary's my favorite. Reminds me of you, sister! A lot! With her blue eyes, glasses, long hair, quiet voice. Hell, she reminds me so much of you that she's the only character capable of making me cry along with her!
But, I ask her to watch an episode here and there because it has taken us two years to finish Season 1, Disk 1. So, I took them into my room and am watching one, two, maybe even five episodes a day. I don't watch them all, because I do want to leave some a surprise when I watch them with Mom...in like a decade. But in the episodes I have seen myself, Carrie fell into the mining shaft, Mary went blind and went to the blind school, married her teacher Adam Kendall after a little bit of cold feet (look at that, sis, she moved away and got engaged! I've never been so reminded of you by a movie character before!), found a little girl even though there was a sandstorm and she was blind before it came along, and moved back to Walnut Grove after her blind school was sold. Willie and Nellie teased her for having glasses, Laura befriended an old man deemed a maniac who lived in a disgustingly filthy house; and, well, Nels Olsen made a comment, true or not is beyond me, about wanting to kill Harriet. And Harriet Olsen overcame her racism to embrace all colors.
Yep. Good times. Lousy music, hate the drama, can't relate to the church-goers, but, good times. I grew up on this show; and I'm so many years behind. Apparently, it's been on TV all this time; but what with basic cable and all...Well, no matter. I'm actually luckier than they are, because I get to choose which episode, when it comes on, and when its commercial breaks are. Plus, I can slip on my headphones and watch it late at night when I can't sleep.
Which reminds me, I better start trying! I can't believe how long this thing is...And to think, it's all about celebrities and their work. Who would've thunk it?
Ah well. G'night!
I saw this commercial for a model doing a photo shoot. She had her legs bent at the knees, and her feet weren't even under her; they were to her sides. Her hands were in her hair, her head was thrown back and her mouth was open. She looked like a mix between a stripper and a fish; and she stood there, just like that, probably swallowing back drool, for minutes as the cameraman got ready to take the picture. Her eyebrows were drawn on and she looked like she had woken up minutes before and slapped the makeup on with her feet without using a mirror. She looked absolutely insane. Beautiful, maybe, but it's ridiculous what people will do for the camera guy. And she'd have looked a lot more beautiful if she'd closed her fat lips, or at least have tilted them into a smile.
'Course, with all that makeup on, if she tried smiling her cheeks might have begun to peel.
And she really needed to put on some clothes. I don't care how thin and smooth you are; I don't want to see all that hanging out while I'm trying to eat. Nor do I want to see naked people so incredibly fat that if they started clapping, they could take flight. I might have a little pouch on me, but at least I don't weigh more than half the mass of the car. In comparison my little belly is wee. Cute, even. Their arms alone probably weigh more than I do. It really inspires me to work out, though, because I don't want to end up like that. Wearing tents for clothing. Having to wear two hospital gowns at once just to cover myself. Having one plane seat for each ass cheek. Being lifted by the construction truck because I couldn't squeeze my fat ass through the double doors. No thank you. There is a limit; and when your belly button can kiss your boobs, you've reached it!
Well, okay, that's probably enough. I probably come across as just a bitch, but I'm really just trying to improve my humor. Not that all that isn't true, but hell, I'm probably just spending too much time around my brother. The tent clothes, the hospital gown, that's all him.
And I claim the rest.
Well, anyway, on to a topic that's not so heavy. I keep bothering Mom, "Want to watch some Little House?" Not that I care for all the drama and tears and church-Bible-God-church-Bible-God stuff. I don't. But, the story lines are generally good. I like the characters. Mary's my favorite. Reminds me of you, sister! A lot! With her blue eyes, glasses, long hair, quiet voice. Hell, she reminds me so much of you that she's the only character capable of making me cry along with her!
But, I ask her to watch an episode here and there because it has taken us two years to finish Season 1, Disk 1. So, I took them into my room and am watching one, two, maybe even five episodes a day. I don't watch them all, because I do want to leave some a surprise when I watch them with Mom...in like a decade. But in the episodes I have seen myself, Carrie fell into the mining shaft, Mary went blind and went to the blind school, married her teacher Adam Kendall after a little bit of cold feet (look at that, sis, she moved away and got engaged! I've never been so reminded of you by a movie character before!), found a little girl even though there was a sandstorm and she was blind before it came along, and moved back to Walnut Grove after her blind school was sold. Willie and Nellie teased her for having glasses, Laura befriended an old man deemed a maniac who lived in a disgustingly filthy house; and, well, Nels Olsen made a comment, true or not is beyond me, about wanting to kill Harriet. And Harriet Olsen overcame her racism to embrace all colors.
Yep. Good times. Lousy music, hate the drama, can't relate to the church-goers, but, good times. I grew up on this show; and I'm so many years behind. Apparently, it's been on TV all this time; but what with basic cable and all...Well, no matter. I'm actually luckier than they are, because I get to choose which episode, when it comes on, and when its commercial breaks are. Plus, I can slip on my headphones and watch it late at night when I can't sleep.
Which reminds me, I better start trying! I can't believe how long this thing is...And to think, it's all about celebrities and their work. Who would've thunk it?
Ah well. G'night!
There is a limit; and when your belly button can kiss your boobs, you've reached it! — You’re right! Also, the people who need to be moved by crane because they literally can’t maneuver themselves out of bed amaze me in the same way watching Hoarders surprises, fascinates, and disgusts me while also making me feel way better about the state of cleanliness in ‘my’ house. :D
ReplyDeleteReminds me of you, sister! A lot! With her blue eyes, glasses, long hair, quiet voice. Hell, she reminds me so much of you that she's the only character capable of making me cry along with her! — Aww :)
Two years to finish Season 1 Disc 1? Does she know how much that set cost me?! I’d have watched them all by now . . . I miss that show. I was SO tempted to unwrap that DVD set, watch it, and keep it, but I didn’t. I was a good girl. Being good sucks, especially in the winter when you’re trapped inside by several feet of snow and don’t want to go outside anyway . . .
—sis, she moved away and got engaged! I've never been so reminded of you by a movie character before!) — Hee! It’s cool sometimes when movie people are like real people someone actually knows, eh? I still can’t believe someone would want me . . . sad thing is, that’s exactly what Geoff says about himself :( It kind of feels “fast” doesn’t it? But I’ve actually known Geoff nearly six years, and lived with him for four! He got me a ring, too . . . I might not believe I was engaged if I didn’t look at the ring once in a while, it still feels so unbelievable . . .
I’ve been watching a ton of The Big Bang Theory lately, and Amy F. F. reminds me of myself (except smarter and funnier and more confident). Sheldon is hilarious. I’m finally starting to see what you like about that show. Penny and Leonard are adorable (Leonard reminds me of Geoff, and Penny is just awesome). I started watching it on March 31, when we stayed overnight in a hotel in Calgary, and there wasn’t much else to do. I ate a ton of ice cream that night, haha. Turns out Geoff used to watch it before I moved in, and stopped because he wasn’t sure I’d like it! (My hating a show hasn’t stopped him from watching Innerspace, Weird or What, How It’s Made, Ancient Aliens, every Star Trek episode ever shown on TV, and tons of movies about aliens, history, and the end of the world, which are things I hate now.) So I finally get your TBBT love! ^_^
First off, how do you Italicize your words?! That is so cool!! Second off - YYYAAAAAAYYYYY! Now I can talk about TBBT with someone I actually know! Besides Lorne and Mom, and neither of them like it too much. Amy also reminds me of me. Brown hair, green eyes, glasses, unpopular in school. And yes, Sheldon is hilarious! He's the first guy I ever truly loved. :)
DeleteCranes! That's the word I was looking for...Thanks! And please, don't ever feel unloved or unwanted. You're neither! And Geoff is proof; and with you he's proof of the same. I think everyone is loved by somebody, even if they don't know it. And I know this will sound really weird coming from a sister, but you're like the bestest person on the planet, literally the most awesome person I know. Might sound strange, but you can remember that if you feel depressed or mad at the world. ^_^
I don't know of a movie character who reminds me of Mom or Lorne...But I do remember making Simselves of all of us back at that house with the rats and the dug-up yard, where we lived across the factory and played in the mud with the RCs. Fun days!
I'm so glad you answered! I was really hoping to talk to you again.
And no. She doesn't know how much the Little House set cost. None of us do. She also wants to watch more episodes more often, but sometimes when I do ask she says maybe tomorrow, and then tomorrow comes and she says no. Or Boyfriend calls and she takes off in the middle of an episode...But I can convince her to relax and watch one or two or even three sometimes. We just have to both be home, awake, and ready. That's rare, because after I've had a sleepless night, I tend to sleep all day. (That's okay with me, but apparently, somehow, it messes up their routine. Don't know how. I try to stay out from underfoot as much as I can.)
How It's Made is okay. I don't care for Star Trek, and I wouldn't know about the rest. But, Lorne likes Star Trek; they have that in common. My brothers. It's so weird, knowing I have one more brother than my sister does! :D
That’s the < i > and < / i > trick that you taught me . . . it works on a lot of sites! :)
DeleteShedon is tied for first place as my favourite character on the show — with Leonard. Penny is my #2 (or 3, depending on your viewpoint). Amy is next, or maybe tied with Raj, and then Bernadette . . . Howard kinda bothers me, too sarcastic . . . ironic, isn’t it, since I’m really sarcastic! :P
Aww, that doesn’t sound weird at all! And it made me smile :D
That was Queen St.! :D We lived there in 2008 ^_^
I used to love How It’s Made, but now the narrator lady’s voice really bugs me. She uses the same tones, speaks at the same pace . . . like zoning out of a lecture in class :o
And one more sister, counting Bobbi — she’s not Jason’s sister :D
I missed talking to you, too! :) Sorry I haven't logged back in on NFSW yet...I'm still planning to! o^.^o
Cool! I wonder if it's the same trick as on YouTube. Some members have even posted comments with bold letters. It could just be typed as < b > and < / b >, but I don't even know if that's how it works on dA...
DeleteFor me, it's Sheldon, Amy, Bernadette, Priya, Leonard, Raj, Howard, and then Penny. Raj is cute, but he's way too dog-crazy for his own good. And Howard, well, I hated him, until he got Bernadette. And Penny is okay, too, but I didn't actually start to like her until the late 7th season, when she finally started to mature.
I thought you'd forgotten about NFSW there for awhile. I'm glad to hear it, though; I'm looking forward to finally seeing you on again! My Friends list has been so inactive...:'(
And get this, I Googled the remake of LHOTP and apparently, they chose Lindsay Lohan to be Mary, Miley Cyrus as Laura, and Justin Bieber as Nellie! And, they chose Snoopp Dogg to portray Dr. Baker. I don't have a problem with him personally, but come on, they don't resemble one another at all. And...Justin Bieber? As a girl? That has to be the funniest thing I have ever seen! I hope my source is horribly wrong, because that show ended just right. Why would they want to remake it at all?
Well, long as Laura doesn't come in like a wrecking ball, and Mary doesn't get into the drugs, and Nellie doesn't start to sing, and Dr. Baker doesn't rap. They should've just left it alone.
Yes, it works that way on DA :)
DeleteLHOTP is awesome...I never forgot the episode with the wolves, or Laura’s horse being shot, or the ‘plague’ that made everyone in WG sick...or the big blizzard!
I’ve already changed my mind...Leonard’s my favourite, Sheldon is 2, Amy and Penny tie for 3, Raj, Bernadette, Howard - who’s Priya? ^_^ I didn’t even know Raj had a dog until tonight’s episode (Bernadette and Howard baby-sit the animal and lose him) :P
Well, then, you and I watched the same episode at the same time! :D
ReplyDeletePriya is Raj's sister, and she studies law. She's also Penny's rival because she and Leonard slept together a few times while Leonard and Penny were on a break.
Oh, wow! Didn't know that! Thanks for telling me :D
DeleteI've only seen a few episodes of the show; I'm really looking forward to seeing them all :D
Well, I hope you enjoy it. And maybe, someday, you and I, and anyone else interested, can sit in the same room and watch it over a big bowl of chips or something.
DeleteAnd thank you for introducing me to Tangled. I still watch it too often for my own good. :D
I can't eat chips yet...but I'm going to try some crackers soon...it's been about 3 years since I ate solid food, been living off soup and potatoes (mashed, with lots of butter to make 'em creamy) since I have trouble swallowing...
DeleteBut I can't complain, I guess, these days I can take vitamins (crushed), and in the old days I'd be dead by now :P
It'd be great to watch it with you, too :D I can eat chocolate if it doesn't have any chunks (basically any food I have to chew, I don't eat, and if it's something that melts, even better) so I can do that when we do movies :D
I couldn't imagine living off of mush for any period longer than it takes to heal from a tooth extraction. Why are you dieting on softs? That doesn't seem too healthy...:(
DeleteI'm sure it's not, but it's like every food I have to chew decides to lodge itself in my throat, where no amount of coughing or drinking will get it out or make it go down. It takes hours of gagging and discomfort for the feeling to go away, so after a few rounds of that, I decided enough was enough. Soup doesn't get stuck down there . . . remember, this happened in 2006, when we lived on Myrtle? I went about six months without eating anything but Nutri-Grain bars, and that was as solid as I would go. Mom and Dad kept ordering pizza, trying to coax me into eating . . . it took months, but finally I ate a whole fish stick, and after that, I was eating everything again. I've actually tried crackers, chips, and cake, which are things you have to chew, and I've gotten both the cake and chips stuck in my throat before. So when I'm feeling brave, I'll try crackers. I hope it helps, too; soup and gravy are great, but they don't always fill my stomach. ^_^
DeleteEww...Gagging for one minute is really enough, isn't it? I also hope crackers help...And maybe after that you could try a fish stick or a Nutri-Grain. [I don't mean to be annoying, I just want you to feel good and be healthy.]
DeleteThank you...you're not annoying at all, can't say the same about other people! :D
DeleteHahaha! That's good, thanks :D
Delete