Devious Blogger Entry

      Um...Okay, so I'm running on zero minutes of sleep, so maybe I'm just slow to catch on. Maybe they did this on purpose. But the characters on Facebook's Flirt City is weirdly accurate to the characters on Big Bang Theory...
      Moving on, in nine months I'm going to get a rather large surgery. And I cannot wait. I am so fucking ready. I'm going to get all my teeth pulled to have dentures put in. By then my hair should be a little longer. I'm thinking of dying it blond and buying lipstick, because I'm in dire need of a confidence boost. I have four weight lifts at my disposal and an exercise bike in my possession, so I'm hoping to improve my fitness, too. Who knows? In three years I could be a confident woman. Wouldn't that be swell.
      Oh, God, even my fingers are tired. I'd go to bed, but...nah. No point. I ignored my responsibility of taking my sleeping pill last night, simply because even though it helps, it also makes me sick to my stomach and I just needed a break from that. But even when I take it, my life goes downhill in one day. I sleep until five, get out of bed with no other reason other than I want to wash my hair before taking the pill again, then I screw around with writing or Simming or whatever, take five minutes to eat Instant Potatoes, and go to bed...sometimes at six, if I'm lucky. And then the cycle just continues. It seems all I do lately is sleep. And it's never enough. I wake up, fall asleep, wake up, fall asleep, have one horrible night where the pill doesn't do shit, sleep until six or seven PM, wake up, fall asleep, wake up, fall asleep. All the while trying not to vomit and pass out in it; meanwhile I just want to be normal.
      It seems luck exists for everyone on the planet, except for me. My brother can fall asleep every night, even if he takes naps. He feels refreshed. He can eat and feel full; he doesn't menstruate; and by the way, the game he plays is still online. My mother has a boyfriend who spoils her silly, and by some miracle, she can tolerate his laugh and the attitude problem he has which makes me look like Mary Poppins. Me, on the other hand. Well. My hair is flat and dead and way too short, my eyes are dead, my lips are cracked, my skin goes green when I lay down, my toes are gray, I lose hearing in one ear, my eyes burn, I'm always tired and hungry, and my luck is just terrible. Oh, and I'm stupid, too. I'm short, my fingers are short, my memory is short, my ears are little, my head is little, my ass is flat, my boobs sag, and I have the voice of a nervous, sputtering boy. But I smile through it because life is short. Not short enough, but once again that's just me.
      I need chocolate. Or a cigarette. Or...to hibernate for ninety years. Or...Well, I could go on and on. But I'd rather just stop right now. Or jump nine months ahead. Where the fuck is a time traveling machine when you need one?
      Clearly I need to go outside to find some sunshine. No, wait. It's cloudy out there, too. Perfect. Ooh, maybe I'll do a Toy Story marathon. Hell, I could make the entire day an animation movie marathon. Wish I had snacks. Well, I do, but I can't take them in here. You know, they know I do it. Why do I need to hide it? I DO IT. I DO IT ALL THE TIME. YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE I DO? LOTS OF STUFF. You don't know me at all. I've told you who I am, but you don't care. And I don't care! I watch Sagwa The Chinese Siamese Cat, and Tinker Bell, and Fly Tales, and Bugs Bunny, and Monsters Inc., which I like BETTER than Shrek, and I watch that, too. I have it memorized; but no, it's not my favorite anymore. Oh, and you know Ice Age, the one with the talking animals? I've got a crush on Diego. I also love Sheldon Cooper. And Amy. You know Friends? I love Chandler. And Phoebe. And I watch that all the time, too. I don't care! If I can't be normal, or pretty, or smart; I'm going to not care what people think anymore. I'm tired of living up to their standards, impressing people I just can't impress. I have crushes - some men, some women. I write books - and I swear like a trucker.
      It feels good to tell the truth. Who knew? You know, I think I'm going to watch another Friends episode and then, maybe, try to sleep. Maybe I'll even finally take last night's pill. I'm on way too damn many pills, and they all make me feel horrible. I take two pills in the morning, then three separate vitamin thingies, then my night pill; and sometimes I have to take Tylenol or Midol, too. It's ridiculous. I feel much older than 23. I'll be damned if all this pill-crushing, taking it with milk and sugar, doesn't suddenly create a violent chain reaction inside me and turn my piss into paste.
      Ooh, piss! That reminds me! I also love Daryl Dixon and Michonne. Maybe I'll watch more Walking Dead. Or Big Bang! I still can't believe they made Maggie pregnant. Honestly, I think they did that just so they could kill off a pregnant lady. Lori was pregnant, but her baby lived, remember? Maybe they just want to say, "Aha! We've done it now! It really says something about our fans if they stick with it."
      You know, I had a song stuck in my head for a week. Maybe two nights ago, I realized - or I think I realized - it was at the end of Toy Story 3, when Andy gives his toys to Bonnie. I think I'll go start that marathon, so I can eventually get to the third. I can't watch a movie without watching them all in order! It's wrong. Except in the case of Shrek. I skip the third each time. DreamWorks, hear me now. I'm your biggest fan, and that one SUCKS ASS! You should feel sorry for yourselves. I would, but you saved your name with the other three.
      Anyway, I feel like I'm going all over the place with this. I guess I'll go and watch some movies! Again. Oh my God, it's 2016! Finding Dory - Toy Story 4 - eek! Sunshine, sunshine, sunshine!

My Babysitter's A Ghost

      Okay, I just had a weird Simming experience.
      Anybody who's played Life Stories will recognize the name Hayden Raha. Well, a couple of months ago, he made the mistake of trying to burgle one of my lots. Of course, I trapped him and tortured him. Each time I played that lot, he was there, wetting himself, passing out and crying like a schoolgirl...It was wonderful.
      Well, today I decided, Hey...I gave Mary Taylor a chance. Why not? Of course, that was only because I loved the name; but I decided if I could reform him, even those he burgled would for some reason want to be his friend. I was right, of course; and soon they were all chummed up and having a good time. And then my Sim had a baby. But, I don't like gray eyes, because there are too many. So I called the kid 9 and exited the lot without saving; and when I come back, Hayden Raha has died on another lot. Which he didn't, because I hadn't played another lot. Really?



See for yourself...

Changes

      I opted for change tonight. I was embarrassed by the childlike appearance of my YouTube account, and wondering if I should delete my channel. So I sort of made a compromise and deleted 65 of my videos. I then proceeded to make five others private. Unfortunately the video called Crokinole, featuring my beloved family during a very rare reunion, didn’t show up in my Video Manager and was yet somehow deleted. So I’m either going to have to re-post it, or hope the DVD copy I made for my sister still works like a charm. And even if it does not, yes, I can re-post.
      Now it’s time for more change. On my FanFiction.Net profile, I said I would be deleting all my incomplete stories, excluding the ones I mentioned in my profile description as “safe”. I also said it would be happening in the New Year, which is finally here; which means I have done my part and given a fair warning; allowing my very few fans to save it so they can rewrite it and give it an ending they like.
      I cannot wait until everything is gone, and what remains looks better...cleaner. Hell, more adult, if you will. My YouTube profile no longer embarrasses me; so I need to keep the change coming.

 

That Was Hard...

      I just did one of the four hardest things I'd ever done; and I am pleased to announce that after three hours of nonstop work, I can now create 323 characters with original names. That big block of work takes up nine pages.
      And that's with a night of no sleep, despite taking a sleeping pill that has enough power to knock even me, a world-renowned insomniac, on my ass for two days. I'm feeling proud...and tired...My eyes are burning again, but I'm proud of what I achieved today. I thought for sure I'd used every name in the book; I'd had no idea how many others there were.
      So if you need names, for Sims or book characters or whatever, just holler.

2-0-1-6

      Happy new Year! I'm so glad it's finally 2016. This is the year movie sequels finally start coming out; and, now I can say bizarre things like, I've been working on my Sims family for three years; and, I haven't washed my hair or gone pee since last year.
      And hopefully this year includes an ounce of inspiration and maybe a stroke of luck. May it have mercy on us all. Wait, I think I said that last year...

Ho, Ho, Ho

      Well, my evening was much better than expected. At first, when I stepped into the house, I thought it was going to be a horrid dinner. The people were all shouting over one another, even if they were right there in the same room, and I was the only one who didn't start drinking. But the man-cave, which was the entrance to the house, was actually pretty cool. Walking in there's this picture on the wall, which says "Family...We may not have it all together, but together we have it all". I loved that. There was a fireplace and a TV bigger than my dresser. There's this Cold Beer thing on the wall, and you open it up and there's all kinds; the perfect thing for any alcoholic.
      Then you go up the stairs and I fucking flipped. I didn't do a cartwheel, I just freaked out. It is the glamorous version of a house I used to live in. You come up the stairs and enter the living room. To your left, the hallway, with bedrooms and the bathroom. But turning right, you pass the doors to this giant porch (which, at one end, had no rail at all), and then keep going to get into the kitchen. I walked all over that house, feeling right at home. And the people? Well, most of them felt just like family members I didn't know I had. They felt like friends. And then I met an old friend, a classmate from my past, who's kind of sort of my family now. I had the best time; I laughed, I drank two cans of pop, and I even played a game where you try to unwrap a gift with oven mitts on, and the other players roll two dice and if they get doubles, they have to put on the mitts and try to unwrap it. The person who finally gets past all the paper gets to keep whatever's inside.
      And I'm sorry, but my aunts, my uncles, my cousins, none of them are that fun. The food was great, and when I left I actually felt sad...and normally I'm just happy to be out the door. But I felt like I'd just left something really good.
      My classmate...Well, both of us were really shy, but once we started talking to one another we did not want to stop. She seems like a good person and she's so motivated and fun. She's my total opposite, but we're also very similar. Several times it was like we were reading one another's mind.
      Then on the drive home, my very drunk mother wanted to get behind the wheel and her boyfriend almost won my respect by saying no, drunk people do not drive, ever. I was just about to thank him for taking care of her, and then out comes the potty-mouth! Good grief! I would not, not ever, let my boyfriend talk to me like that.
      Oh, and his mother gave me twenty more dollars. So now I have ninety-five dollars in fun money, and come GST, I'll have over two hundred. Aaaaand, my mom wants to talk to me about giving me one of her awesome cameras, so that's one less thing to buy! I just feel very happy right now and I'll remember this day for a long time. And if I don't, well, I'll just read this.
      Now, if you'll excuse me, the effects of the yummy food I ate may be long gone, but the Pepsi is catching up to me real fast.

Going Out For Dinner

      I suppose this big dinner at some stranger's house is just because it's the twenty-fifth of December. I don't know why people let the birthday of a non-existent deity go to their heads; nobody ever made that much fuss about Mary, and she's the only woman to ever give birth without having sex. She's like a holy magician, and she gets no love. Sad.
      Anyway, I'm thinking of making some fudge. Not because it's Christmas, but rather because I have a sweet tooth and it wants dessert. Actually, for a long time now I've wanted those tiny, swirl-shaped balls of dough rolled in sugar, but apparently we can't do that without making a couple of pies. Not that they would have much of a chance to go stale.
      Oh, crap, I just realized we haven't gone out looking at the Christmas lights yet. That's like the only tradition that's stuck through the years. I'm not even sure if we're having turkey tonight; for all I know it's grilled cheeses. Oh well; I suppose I really don't care, as long as we don't starve. I guess my biggest problem with tonight is that only two of us are even bothering to go to this dinner. I understand it's a day of family being together - not like every day shouldn't be - but it's just unsettling to know that one of us will be sitting at home, chatting online if his friends don't stand him up for last-minute plans. And I don't even know what the rest of my family will be doing.
      Something fun, I hope. Or at least spending it in good health.