Early Morning Rambles

      Just thirteen days until my birthday! Well, thirteen days and nineteen hours. I hope we're not moving on that day.
      I can't believe I've only had 23 birthdays so far. Seems I spend 364 days waiting for the sixth of December, and then it's gone and I'm wondering why I was so impatient. Especially since I don't have friends, or parties anymore. I just get older and sometimes it's the worst day of my life. My last birthday, I was looking forward to making my own cake, and then it was done for me. All my plans were thrown out the window, and my family argued with everything I said. It was like every other day of my life. And here I am, looking forward to it again. I may be getting older, but I'm not learning.
      I don't even know why I waste 364 days a year waiting for that one day. It's not like I even consider my birthday to be a 24-hour occasion. I was born at 8:37 AM. So, in my way of thinking, my birthday hasn't begun at 8:36, and at 8:38 it's over. So in truth I only have sixty seconds to eat cake and feel special, and that doesn't happen anymore. It used to. Every time I learned some-thing, I felt good about myself. I felt good when I spoke to a neigh-bor, or made a new friend. I guess the last time I really felt good about myself was when, with the help of my sister, we fired our godmother for being a bitch.
      But at least I still have the memory. Maybe I should hire her back, and fire her again on my birthday so I'll have a birthday ann-iversary. I could call it a birthary. Or a birthiversary. I don't know which one I like better!

Ha!

      I just saw an ad blooper! It says that over fifty million people play Family Farm, but beneath it says, "500,000 people play this". Not even one million, and they say over fifty. How embarrassing that must be! That person needs to go back to school and learn how to count.

The Serial Series

      Well, I had a lousy night. First I dreamed that my current house had two floors, and was on a farmland, and this guy drove by our window pointing a gun at me. I wake up, realize I'm wake, and fall blissfully back into sleep - and dream the same guy points the same gun through the windshield.
      In both dreams there were sirens. In the first dream he shot me through each kidney, then killed all my loved ones and made me watch while I died a slow, painful, bloody death. In the second dream I recognized him as the bad guy from my first dream.
      Honestly, I'm hesitant to go anywhere now. Especially when I hear sirens. I'm fine watching scary movies before bed, but last night I went out for a late drive and I was totally freaked out. You probably think it's silly to be afraid because I had a dream, but I actually have a history of my dreams coming true.
      Unfortunately I haven't become a millionaire or discovered I could fly.
      Yet.

...

      So.
      Recently we looked at a house...I think it was perfect for us. Now my brother has doubts about it, and he's kind of the alpha dog in this house. When he speaks, Mom listens, and what I think or feel or say gets overlooked.
      He's worried that after two months, the utilities cost will increase. So based on a fear which might not come true, they might decide to not take the one house we have a chance with. And it sucks, because I adored that house. I think of it as home already, and that never happened here. I thought of this place as "a house".
      But what sucks the most is that everything he said makes sense.
      And even if we did move into an affordable place, he might opt out on cable. No Internet. No deviantART, no Facebook, no Internet Checkers, none of it. My computer would just be good for writing books I can't publish online. And that sucks, too, because I'm on a roll with Big Bang Theory fanfics. People love them! That's never happened.
      I wish we could just take the chance. I wish every decision wasn't his call. But since it is, we won't. We'll stay right here until late November, and he'll bitch and moan that it wasn't what he wanted.
      And I'm guessing we'll wind up in some crappy, lowest-level apartment I'll hate more than this place. We'll have neighbors above us and on each side of us and it'll be noisy, disgusting and utter hell. And probably cold as ****, too.
      So, hey, we have that to look forward to.

WTF...

      I took a nap earlier and had one of the weirdest dreams. I guess it's because I looked at the cover image for a movie called Treasure Planet, and the picture featured a flying ship; but I dreamed that these three to five animated little people were flying after this spaceship, which had a killed and gutted dolphin strapped to the top, and it flapped along as this spaceship flew over the cliffy waterfalls of Brave and over the water of Rhubarb Island, going so low and so fast that water flew up underneath and almost capsized a little sailboat. That might have been from Big Hero 6. Anyway, these characters are briefly shown at a headfirst angle, flying, turning and doing spins in the air; and this one character's irises disappear and her eyes are only whites, until she straightens out, and then her eyes do that creepy rolling thing you see with dizzy emoticons. This other character lands on a little islet attached to Rhubarb Island, and takes off this weird bandana thing (to a sound effect), and he looks around and he's got these intense sapphire eyes. These characters all land near one another and they watch this weird ship fly away with that poor dolphin flapping like a wind-sock.
      Meanwhile I'm down below, using my Power Berry or whatever it's called to swim very fast around the islets, and sometimes I smash boxes or vases to get the rewards before jumping back in the water. Well, there's this big fucking swan sitting there; of course there are no swans in the game because they're not exactly seen as vicious monsters, but I jump off this islet, go over half the distance and make a big splash next to this feeding swan. And I yell "Sorry!" as I run up the bridge, which is baffling because the character's don't talk; they just get a speech bubble when you send a message. Anyway, the swan doesn't belong, the ship doesn't belong, and the flapping dolphin kite damn sure doesn't belong; but I'm watching these people and this ship and this poor sea creature fly all over the fucking place; meanwhile The Raiders March is playing in the background. Thanks a lot, BBT.
      So it was pretty strange, but I'm not complaining. I'm actually surprised; I didn't think my mind was that messed up. I'm im-pressed.
      And a little sad for the dolphin.

PMO

      So many times I've been online, people have asked me the one question that makes me want to sink my fingernails into my eye sockets, grab a handful of jelly, and pull.
      "Are you single? Are you single? Are you single?"
      Yes. I am. What about it? Are you making plans in your pint-sized head? Do you think I want somebody so desperate that they ask me online without even meeting me first? People like this 455h013 really p155 me off. "Will you be my gf?" Umm, no. A.), because you're desperate enough to ask me online; B.), I don't like people, C.), you use Internet slang, and D.), I don't think I like men.
      This game is...a game. It's not a dating site. It's called Friendbase, not Get2SecondBase. What kind of person do you think I am? I'm not a whore, and I'm not giving it away to just anyone who asks me. I don't even know if I'd give it away to The One. Not like I believe in The One, anyway. What a load of sh1t.
      From now on when people call me baby, or hottie, or sexy, I'm going to say "Hello and don't call me that." When they ask me if I'm single I'm going to lie and say no. Where do they get the fukking nerve? Like I'm really going to swoon at some pathetic attempt to meet me in a dark alleyway at night.