Virtual Rambles

      I was introduced to E-Bay a few days ago. They have everything! I'm hoping to get a Visa soon and sell some crap so I'll have money to put onto it...Before 2019 I'm hoping to have all the movies and even a game that I have never, not once, seen in stores. And if I had known about E-Bay earlier I could have saved myself the ten minutes I spent crammed in a store smaller than the living room between a sick guy and a farting guy, only to leave empty-handed, disappointed and grossed out.
      But the only thing I caught was a liking to online shopping. It all started when Mom loaned me enough money to buy 49,000 coins in my game. Cool thing about her is, she said it was a gift and was happy to help. And I'm on the moon, because spending all that money made me reach level 30! Quickly, too; I was only on level 29 for about a week; and I'd been on level 28 for two months. But thanks to her, I was able to design the most expensive character in the entire game. I don't look poor anymore! If I may brag - and it's my blog, so I will - my character costs 32 grand and has nineteen homes!
      Now if only they could get rid of all these extra online movie websites and just have one that actually worked, I could get last night's movie night started. Tried to watch something about an hour and a half long, only to realize that only the first half hour had been uploaded.
      But knowing I can finally finish my movie collection, buy the game I've been looking for since 2014 and maybe even a shirt, for $35....makes me feel like the world doesn't have to be so boring. The question is, what do I have that I can sell? This game is awesome; the prices for money are extremely low. The lowest price is only 99 cents. The highest is ninety-nine dollars and ninety-nine cents. Actually affordable. If I can make two hundred dollars I'm getting 200,000 coins and spending all of it...That should get me to at least level 34.
      I designed a game myself. It's not published or playable or anything, but I love the concept. Seems like it would be a big step in the gaming industry. It's basically life, but with enhanced character design. You would click on the hair and drag the mouse to make it longer or shorter and determine how it flows; you would click on each button of a sweater to open or close that one button; and if you know you can't log in to pay your rent, you could choose to pay a lump sum in advance...And since I'm tired of needing to collect a certain amount of virtual money, everything would be free until you click Save. Open world featuring interactive objects, including cars, maybe featuring real places, maybe the Eiffel tower. Of course it would have smooth animations, bright colors, and awesome graphics; not like those games anybody ever grew up with. We've come a long way since 2004, and this game would show it. And if your character got a job, you would actually have to do it; like if she were a hotel housekeeper you would actually follow her through the building, making sure she earns the paycheck. Cars could break down, you could fix them...The only thing I haven't designed is its type: Single-player world, or MMO?

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      I can't believe that the Shrek movie series began seventeen years ago. I feel so old. I remember when I first received it on my birthday the year it came out. I lived on a farm. My idea of a good time was riding my bike and watching the animals. I watched it with my neighbor, who was four at the time, and got to the point where Shrek yells, What are you doing in my swamp? And I was called home, and my brother and his wife gave me the movie. I was ecstatic. I remember the layout of our houses, and the secret passage in the backyard, and the big gap under her porch where we hid one time eating bananas.
      It's so different now. I'm different. I'd shave off ten years of my life if it meant I could be a kid again for a day. And no, Stiltskin, don't get any ideas. But Fiona pulls out her knife on Shrek, and he tells her what he knows about her. That when she signs her name, she puts a heart over the I. She sings so beautifully that birds explode. She doesn't like the covers wrapped around her feet and sleeps by candlelight...Blah, blah, blah. Don't get me wrong - beautiful movie. Love warrior Fiona. Love her lines, love Cameron Diaz, it's perfect.
      But what about that Sir Justin picture on the bottom of her bed? He should have thrown that in there. A lot of women sing and dot their I's with hearts, and she knew that. But nobody else knows about the figurines on her fireplace mantle. And she would have really been blown away if he described the view from her bedroom window.

Let The Good Times Roll

      Life here is both weird and fantastic, lately. Yes, I still have my complaints; but certain aspects in life have improved! Like...my game. I bought a lovely dress with wings (in my game, obviously) and it's a sheer glowy gold, and it comes with giant wings. And it was only one dollar short of ten freakin' grand! I actually had to make another account to gift it to myself, because my main account only has 8 dollars. The game also has a cat with a crown on its head, which also costs 9,999; and a 'real gold' iPhone costing 7,999. It'll take awhile, but eventually I'll have an account worth more than 31k!
      And my Sims are going great, too. It's been over a year, maybe almost two by now, since I lost the biggest family anyone has ever made; but even with my small, current family I don't think I could be much happier than this. I made a large, beautiful house and called it Indigo Palace, and my Sims actually have grandparents on both sides of the family!
      Life is weird in the way that my mother has been on a Shrek marathon. I had to offer because she was sick of going through all of Big Bang Theory and That '70s Show in three weeks, but I was not expecting her to say yes - or even watch Shrek Forever After one night after another - and even say she's going to watch Shrek 1 again. I would have sooner bet my life that she would rather have thrown those movies out than watch them.
      The weirdest and most fantastic? I cut my own hair earlier this month, and it's above my shoulders and it's actually straight! It doesn't even touch my shoulders, which is awesome, because when it does and it's wet, it feels like it's trying to cut me. First I asked my mother to cut it, but by the time I smelled the wine on her breath it was a lopsided mess. So I fixed it! Think Rapunzel, except it's all one length and has the ability to grow back.
      A few days ago it also snowed. Not a lot, but enough where I watched it fall past a street lamp. And then I had pizza, and pop, and chocolate. And lately I've been making perfect grilled cheeses. And my brother cooks these amazing meals. Meat, veggies, pot-atoes, stuffing, and it's all nice and soft and yummy. I normally get stuck with dishes, but lately I've been assigned other tasks...thank goodness. Don't get me wrong, that's important; but when you're doing everybody's dishes and sometimes there's over seventy of them and they don't rinse anything and you're sore and it's past your bedtime and you're stuck there for over an hour - you really start to want to be doing literally anything else.
      All my books are going nowhere, but I'd rather try and fail than succeed at doing nothing. I'm on my gazillionth attempt, and I'm already dissatisfied. But then I read the script of fantastic movies, and I'm surprised at how boring it actually is if I'm not hearing and seeing it. Besides, people actually think Gangnam Style and Pineapple Pen are great songs, so my chances are actually pretty good.
      I am just so happy right now! I wish I could feel like this for-ever.

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      Bro told me a funny story yesterday; he had called for a cab, and when the taxi driver saw me standing outside he called me the scary Albino chick. It's the cutest thing anyone's ever called me! I'm going to make that my new username. Maybe get a special mug.

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      I can't believe I haven't written about this yet, but a few nights ago I had the weirdest dream. I was playing the controller, and all I could see of myself were my thumbs. The screen took up the rest of the view, but you couldn't see a screen; it was more like Super Mario and I were in the same room. Anyway, I'm running over bridges, and they fall away once I get to the other side. He's got the raccoon tail and I'm making him fly when I don't make him jump far enough, but there are a bunch of mushrooms all over the place, and when I land on the tops they shoot me off-screen.
      Here's the weird part. When I get to the boss, there are actually three of them. One of them is Santa Claus. I can't defeat them, but I blast my way through them and actually finish the level. And the next thing I know I'm me, in the real world, inside a school; running through hallway after hallway looking for a teacher named Mr. Solomon; meanwhile the Nintendo bosses are still chasing me.
      Oh, and here's another weird dream. I'm living at our house on Blueberry with Mom and Bro, except the western wall in the living room has been torn away and there's a giant audience sitting there. The cast of Friends is there, and Monica and Phoebe are acting like a couple. Anyway, we get a call that our "baby is ready for pickup", and Mom and Bro head out; next thing I know he's knocking on the door with an armful of laundry. Then we're walking through this experi-menting room, and people are testing out all kinds of equipment on themselves.
      Actually, not as weird as I remember. I've had weirder. Like jumping off the Ptarmigan 2 porch that has no rails and flying away; and then, the next night, standing on the same porch with rails, knowing I can fly but frustrated because the rail's in my way. Breathing underwater. Changing my appearance by just thinking about it, and then losing control of the ability and not being able to stop changing my appearance; kinda like Cassie in The Reaction, I guess.
      I think the weirdest dream is the one where I'm hiding in a closet with twelve newborns, watching these furry monsters invade the house. That was weird. Or the one where I'm in a glass elevator with my husband (I don't even actually have a boyfriend yet), shooting out one baby after another, and this elevator isn't even in a building. It's outside, everyone can see me (eesh!), and it doesn't even go anywhere. It just...keeps going.
      I think if I stopped dreaming, I'd have a better chance of feeling rested in the morning.

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      Lately I've been getting 20 minutes to 2 hours of sleep each night. Naturally, my attention span is destroyed during the day and I take naps. I heard you can only go as far as 14 days without getting any sleep at all, and then death. I'm wondering how I've made it this far, but I'll do whatever it takes to at least make it to see all the good movies coming out.
      Anyway, my last nap was actually pleasant. I've had three naps today and the first two were okay, as far as dreams are con-cerned...Except they only gave me three hours of extra sleep com-bined, and I was woken up by thumping and banging. Apparently I'd built this strange home in Sims 3, with a tall tower in the middle of a platform with stairs going up to the ground. And then I had to fence off the stairs because there were two zombies and a burglar on my lot.
      My third dream was....pretty cool, actually. Shame it ended so soon. I was playing Sims 3 again, using the lifetime happiness cheat. (Fun fact; in real life, I used it to get to 2 million.) Except, somewhere along the line, it got mixed up with Avakin Life, and I was using the cheat to get limitless coins. I went crazy buying stuff. And then, naturally, I woke up and was disappointed. Ughh...Coins are so hard to come by in this game. Unless you have real money you can blow on it. Which I don't, sadly.
      It was a good pick-me-up, because in my dream I'd read an article that Helen Mirren had died. Just sucks, how expensive everything is in this game. Oh, sure, they finally added that waitress job, so you're not getting 250 coins every 5 months, but a simple name change costs 5,000 coins. A car, which has zero function, costs up to 199,999. For my goal I need 2,696. Sometimes people don't order. Or they do, and then leave before you can bring them their item. You can earn as little as 3 coins per job. My highest has been 30. Sometimes you meet generous people who order all damn day; I finally got up to 567 coins. Near my goal? Not at all.
      I'd say it's not worth it, if I had something else going on. I'm busting my ass trying to write books, and no one cares. I'm trying to be excited about how far I've gotten, but I'm not even sure if they're half-decent.
      Long story short, this affordability problem is exactly why I planned a game where everything is free until you click Save. It's an awesome game. It's so modern and smooth. The character's wrists wouldn't cave in like the Sims' wrists do. You could grab the character's hair and move it around to make it curl however you want. All name changes free forever. I just want a game where you can use your imagination without worrying about fake finances! Where do all these fake coins go, anyway? I'm not putting real money into it, so how does it benefit the company? Is it like a Bitcoin deal?
      There's this feature called a Build Machine. If the item has a blue box in the top right corner, you can use the Build Machine to slowly lower its price until the item is free. Very handy; I garbed my girl for Halloween and Christmas at zero cost. But you have to wait as long as a month to get a dress. And if your game is like mine, one day the dress will disappear, never to be found again even though there is no delete button. You can't sell anything you own; which sucks, because I know I won't reach my goal. Well. Maybe by next year. How sad is that? I remember a time when I completed my New Year's Resolution on the first day of January. Bought this computer. Now it's six years old.
      Oh, I know, I know. No one cares. Why did you read to this point? Look at it all! It's a longer block of text than my book had been for the first 11 years of its life!

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      Today I reached the end of my patience and got a haircut. Ten, eleven inches, gone. It always got so tangled, and combing it out would make me lose a fistful. I dreaded every shampoo, never wanted to even brush it. I would either pin it up or just let it hang, like a greasy nest. Must've been some sight, with my fuzzy Bazinga pants and my fuzzy plaid housecoat.
      I feel human again, and not nearly as depressed.